Just a disclaimer.

I'm not sure what I'm trying to accomplish from this. I'm hoping it can be a way for me to release some of the everyday tensions I carry around.





I'm an everyday kinda girl. With my own little spin on life. I'm not always tactful or gentle. I have a horrible mouth at times. It's getting better-ish. It's a process. Don't judge me. I'm trying to come into my own. I have people all around me who
I have things in common with but, for the most part, I'm pretty singular. I Hope I am the type of person that people will consider a true friend. A strong willed, smart, kind person. At times when I speak people think I'm angry because I speak with passion. It drives me nuts. I hate being labeled. I'm probably more paranoid about it than I should be. God knows I pick shit apart until all the flavor is gone out of it. I have been known to just chew it and chew it and then stick that shit in my hair. It's pretty ridiculous. I recently met some people who didn't really have a care in the world. They didn't have anything really. They radiated positivity. It was all good. Rain? No problem. No ride? No problem. They were just hitchhiking along. Seeing what all was out there. More or less just drifting along through life. Totally free. I was supposed to meet these people I just know it. I think they are going to show me how to just be.I believe that they are going to teach me how can I make myself not care about this or that. It's not as if it matters anyway. Yet, there are certain things that I snag onto with my mind and it's all I can do to file it away. It.Makes.Me.NUTS. Praise god for hippies.



I want to be uber organized. I want to have a little home for all my shit. Everything in its place. I want to be scheduled and structured. Yet, I want to be free in my own mind. I don't want to care if so and so is setting themselves up to fail. I don't want to be pulled into drama. That part is getting better. Ever since I got back into the groove of letting people have it when they cross me the bullshit has really leveled off. I want to get my house in order and have it be the comfy little safe place I have in my mind.



I feel so reluctant about actually publishing this. Why should I even care!? What difference will other people reading this make!? I wish I could be as care free as people think I am. For the most part I'm pretty good but, there are certain things that I am so shy about. A LOT of people would call you stupid if you said my name in the same sentence as shy... I feel like I always have to be "on" around some people. They don't know me at all really. Does that make me a liar or them stupid? Maybe it's a bit of both.